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Welcome to the latest in a series of instructive articles aimed at making vaping safer. It’s dangerous this vaping lark, all the newspapers say so, so we are delighted to do anything we can in order to help. Only a stupid person would ignore the risk - don’t ignore the risk.
In the running to lift the coveted “The Best Ever Worst Ecig Article in the History of Ever” award, journalists and would-be keyboard thumpers have been clambering over themselves to spout nonsense. Although disappointed not to have had at least one of the regular Stealthvape ones nominated, we felt magnanimous enough to applaud the overall winner.
We have all been to or seen pictures of that place where a number of vapers are meeting up. After a countdown, gleefully, everyone helps to create a fog bank inside a room. Anti-vape campaigners will tell you that this constitutes second-hand vape, and that when it settles it becomes some kind of dangerous third-hand vape. Not so, according to a strange source.
Everybody knows that we have few peers when it comes to ideas for new ways to take the vape market forward. Our thinking hats work overtime, industriously focussing upon invention drives us to greater heights. News this week has made us pause and reflect, and then doff our hats at the mind of a true genius.
Seasoned vapers will have become accustomed to scientific journals publishing supposed studies that appear to offer little by way of sound scientific method. As is the way with peer-review, some of the more outlandish claims and conclusions eventually get retracted or downplayed – but these never seem to make it into the mainstream media.
We cherish freedom of expression and thought at Stealthvape Towers. If you want to believe the Moon is made of cheese or the world is flatter than the enthusiasm for a Spice Girls reunion, great. Some people really want to hate vaping and vapers but aren’t sure how to go about it, so here’s our helpful guide.
Fads and gadgets come and go. Spotting the right place and time for something that perfectly captures the technological zeitgeist of a generation is no easy thing – but we are masters at our game.
No matter where you looked this week (be it the Greenock Telegraph, the Pharmaceutical Journal or Italy’s Sig Magazine) everybody seemed to be talking about how successful vaping is. For the very first time, more than half of Britain’s vapers have quit smoking – or “Gran Bretagna, vapers esclusivi superano consumatori duali” as Sig put it. Congratulations everybody!
Buses, revolutionary teaching techniques, a sale at a major retail chain – miss one and there’ll be another along in a short while. Didn’t manage to grab that socket set from Halfords when it was half-price? Don’t worry it’ll be on special offer again next week, such is the tedious predictability of life. Missed out on your chance to express your opinion by marking an X in a box? If you haven’t noticed it, there’s another election coming up. Hooray.
If we could be bothered to go out and buy a trophy so that we could award a trophy to public health stupidity, this week we would present it to Ireland’s Health and Information and Quality Authority (HIQA). Despite having produced a report to demonstrate the benefits of vaping, HIQA are demanding the Irish Minister of Health does not embrace vaping.