â€œBut itâ€™s just a show about walking,â€ Joan said. â€œWalking slowly at that. How the heck can you watch this rubbish?â€ This from a woman who could only burn oven chips and yet sits through each and every celebrity chef show. Her ability to see Dave through bouts of severe manful hadnâ€™t been improved by sitting transfixed by Casualty either.
â€œItâ€™s a demonstration,â€ Dave replied while sending the empty tin flying off a wall and missing the bin by a good foot. â€œTheyâ€™re demonstrating about not liking something or other and how they want other people not to like it either. Look, theyâ€™ve got signs about cheese â€“ it must be something to do with cheese or all dairy products or shops.â€
â€œSeems bloody stupid to me. I didnâ€™t like it when they told me to stop vaping in the library but I didnâ€™t bloody walk anywhere.â€ Joan was correct; sheâ€™d carried on vaping until she was encouraged to leave by to police specials. â€œHang on, does this walking and demonstrating thing work then?â€
And so an idea was born.
Dave and Joan set to work on making the very best placards a felt tip pen and an old shoebox could manage. Well, if theyâ€™d thought of something to write but the cider had a soporific effect their collective brain. When the result was discovered on the kitchen table in the morning they both wondered why theyâ€™d spent a night collecting swear words.
Agreeing that the placards were probably a stupid idea, the couple decided just to shout a lot and walk with purpose. â€œBoo,â€ they bellowed. â€œBoo and shame,â€ they barked at No.10. Now obviously, living in Stoke, London was quite a distance and cost more than a breakfast pint in The Spitbucket Arms. Joan and Dave didn’t bother with London so No.10 The Laurels had to do.
â€œIâ€™m not sure this is working,â€ Joan said in that way that makes a statement sound like a question. â€œMrs Owens looks confused.â€
â€œTwitter,â€ said Dave. â€œWeâ€™ll use Twitter to ram our message home. Theyâ€™ll take notice of that because itâ€™s what all the protestors do.â€ But then they werenâ€™t sure how to use Twitter or whom they should send their message to. And they were more than a little bit unclear as to what their message was.
The plan evolved. A sit down protest in KFC seemed the best way forward because it was near the library and almost lunchtime. A sit down protest with chicken burgers and gravy. Have that in your face fascist politicians. Or not, most of it was being shovelled into Joanâ€™s at a rate of knots. Vape protests may be going out of fashion in the rest of the country but this one lit a fire in the hearts of the couple. â€œNext time, how about we try one of them naked protests?â€