Innate hoarding


We’ve all travelled this road to a lesser or greater extent. The hunt for something that rewards with a superior vape inexorably leads to purchasing mods and atomisers. And then more mods and atomisers. And then more. We call it ‘collecting’ to justify the unusable quantity of excess. And we change the course of conversation if people begin to question it…

“Oh look at this daft person on television, the wife. Look at them with their ridiculous collection of pristine Star Wars effigies all in the packaging and everything. What on Earth are they thinking?â€

Of course, then she looks over at me attempting to fit all of my drip tips into the holes on the self-made mod stand. Not the first self-made mod stand mind, that one ran out of space within a couple of weeks, no, the fifth generation self-made mod stand. But unfortunately the fifth generation self-made mod stand didn’t account for the advent of excellent box mods and only had 24mm holes. She looks over at me with my fifth generation self-made mod stand, that she never saw the point in to begin with, as I attempt to shoehorn it between the box mods and the 26650 tubes. She looks at me and sighs.

My go-to position on regulated devices was formed during the ownership of a V2 Vamo. Regulateds always had wobbly buttons and a stupid gap between the top and the atty. All regulateds were like this because my Vamo was like this. Being able to umbrella concepts is innate to us; if it has claws and pointy teeth then it is probably going to try to eat us. Generalising prevents us being attacked in the High Street by sabre-toothed tigers and the like. And hoarding ensures the cave is always full of mammoth meat. If the wife were reading this as I type she’d be sighing all over again.

Boxes, as for the majority of vapers, have taken over my vaping. I made sure I kept some mechs back from the last clear-out but they see less use than Russell Brand’s comb. And from buying everything I saw, I began to shift to saving for fewer choice bits of kit. And then, akin to a politician once elected, I stopped bothering altogether.

But the little Goblin got me in the mood to see how the budget end of boxes now stacks up – and the Kbox stands testament to my excellent hunter/gatherer skills. I’m staggered at how good cheap vaping gear has become while I was frittering away the children’s inheritance. So good in fact I may have to scrap plans for the sixth generation self-made mod stand and set about on the seventh.